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    Just adding the [drama] tag back.<br>
    --D<br>
    <br>
    <div class="moz-cite-prefix">On 11/19/13, 10:44 AM, rachel lyra
      hospodar wrote:<br>
    </div>
    <blockquote
cite="mid:CAFp750u2z5gMEn1vKipTvYAq41x0xf_EBSHDU56PBtccASk4gg@mail.gmail.com"
      type="cite">
      <p dir="ltr">Perhaps you will also agree to stop sending me
        private emails. I do not want you in my inbox.</p>
      <p dir="ltr">I will take silence as assent.</p>
      <div class="gmail_quote">On Nov 19, 2013 10:37 AM, "jim" <<a
          moz-do-not-send="true" href="mailto:jim@well.com">jim@well.com</a>>
        wrote:<br type="attribution">
        <blockquote class="gmail_quote" style="margin:0 0 0
          .8ex;border-left:1px #ccc solid;padding-left:1ex">
          <br>
          <br>
          Certainly. I agree.<br>
          <br>
          <br>
          On Tue, 2013-11-19 at 09:54 -0800, rachel lyra hospodar wrote:<br>
          > I'd rather that anyone who is going to be dismissive of
          my concerns<br>
          > call me The Rachel Who Shall Not Be Named, TRWSNBN for
          short, rather<br>
          > than a cozy little insider nickname. I am not part of
          your Noisebridge<br>
          > anymore, jim, and so it does not make sense for you to
          number me<br>
          > within its system.<br>
          ><br>
          > On Nov 18, 2013 3:29 PM, "jim" <<a
            moz-do-not-send="true" href="mailto:jim@well.com">jim@well.com</a>>
          wrote:<br>
          ><br>
          >             My recollection is that Rachel Hospodar<br>
          >         has referred to herself as Rachel 2.0. If<br>
          >         I'm mistaken, I apologize if that's what<br>
          >         she wants.<br>
          ><br>
          ><br>
          ><br>
          >         On Mon, 2013-11-18 at 15:05 -0800, Rachel
          McConnell wrote:<br>
          >         > <headdesk/><br>
          >         ><br>
          >         > Jim, just because I call myself Rachel1.0,
          does NOT MEAN<br>
          >         Rachel Hospodar<br>
          >         > is Rachel 2.0!  She gets to decide herself
          what she wants to<br>
          >         be called.<br>
          >         >   Jeez.<br>
          >         ><br>
          >         > On 11/18/13 1:26 PM, jim wrote:<br>
          >         > ><br>
          >         > >      Rachel 2.0 is correct. I have
          dismissed her.<br>
          >         > > I stand by my claim that she seems to
          have no<br>
          >         > > idea what I've said, and because of my
          feeling<br>
          >         > > I believe there is no point for me to
          engage<br>
          >         > > discussion. It seems to me she is not
          open to<br>
          >         > > my wrong thoughts or my right ones.<br>
          >         > ><br>
          >         > >     As to that I replied to her
          privately, I<br>
          >         > > prefaced my reply explaining that I did
          not<br>
          >         > > want to burden the list: my wish to
          terminate<br>
          >         > > discussion with her had no bearing on
          the<br>
          >         > > other discussions in the thread.<br>
          >         > ><br>
          >         > ><br>
          >         > ><br>
          >         > > On Mon, 2013-11-18 at 12:56 -0800,
          rachel lyra hospodar<br>
          >         wrote:<br>
          >         > >> Here is an example of jim being
          dismissive on this<br>
          >         thread. He sent it<br>
          >         > >> to me privately and I was ignoring
          it. Full email incl<br>
          >         below.<br>
          >         > >><br>
          >         > >>> It seems to me that you have no
          idea what I've said.<br>
          >         This is my last<br>
          >         > >> reply to you.<br>
          >         > >><br>
          >         > >> I have done my best to read his
          emails and articulate why<br>
          >         my ideas are<br>
          >         > >> so different than his, why his very
          words were so wildly<br>
          >         > >> inappropriate. Given that Jim has
          previously hired me for<br>
          >         work,<br>
          >         > >> invited me to his house, and
          subsequently been a<br>
          >         reluctant part of a<br>
          >         > >> public discussion with me about Bad
          Touch And Respecting<br>
          >         Boundaries, I<br>
          >         > >> was perhaps expecting my viewpoint
          to be relevant.<br>
          >         > >><br>
          >         > >> The problem i see is that jim
          believes he is being<br>
          >         misunderstood, when<br>
          >         > >> in fact he is often being
          understood very well. I think<br>
          >         he is<br>
          >         > >> conflating his intention with his
          language and with his<br>
          >         impact. They<br>
          >         > >> are three very separate things. I
          repeatedly see him<br>
          >         writing that he<br>
          >         > >> is being misunderstood, and
          repeatedly read in his<br>
          >         writing that he<br>
          >         > >> believes others are overreacting
          and ignoring what he is<br>
          >         writing.<br>
          >         > >><br>
          >         > >> I think that many people have a
          cognitive block around<br>
          >         accepting that<br>
          >         > >> the impact of their words or
          actions was very different<br>
          >         than intended,<br>
          >         > >> or that their stated intention is
          often directly<br>
          >         contravened by their<br>
          >         > >> words and actions.<br>
          >         > >><br>
          >         > >> Without the willingness to admit
          one's own need to<br>
          >         change, there is no<br>
          >         > >> real way to engage with people who
          have a problem with<br>
          >         your behavior.<br>
          >         > >><br>
          >         > >> R.<br>
          >         > >><br>
          >         > >><br>
          >         > >> ---------- Forwarded message
          ----------<br>
          >         > >> From: "jim" <<a
            moz-do-not-send="true" href="mailto:jim@systemateka.com">jim@systemateka.com</a>><br>
          >         > >> Date: Nov 16, 2013 3:48 PM<br>
          >         > >> Subject: Re: [Noisebridge-discuss]
          anti-anonymity<br>
          >         proposals<br>
          >         > >> To: "rachel lyra hospodar" <<a
            moz-do-not-send="true" href="mailto:rachelyra@gmail.com">rachelyra@gmail.com</a>><br>
          >         > >> Cc:<br>
          >         > >><br>
          >         > >>><br>
          >         > >>><br>
          >         > >>> (replying personally so's not
          to burden<br>
          >         > >>> the list)<br>
          >         > >>><br>
          >         > >>> It seems to me that you have no
          idea of what<br>
          >         > >>> I've said. This is my last
          reply to you.<br>
          >         > >>><br>
          >         > >>><br>
          >         > >>><br>
          >         > >>> On Sat, 2013-11-16 at 14:42
          -0800, rachel lyra hospodar<br>
          >         wrote:<br>
          >         > >>>> Responses Inline. God save
          us all.<br>
          >         > >>>><br>
          >         > >>>> On Nov 15, 2013 8:36 PM,
          "jim" <<a moz-do-not-send="true"
            href="mailto:jim@systemateka.com">jim@systemateka.com</a>><br>
          >         wrote:<br>
          >         > >>>>><br>
          >         > >>>>><br>
          >         > >>>>> There are so many
          problems with what you<br>
          >         > >>>>>> have written that I
          honestly believe you need to hire<br>
          >         someone<br>
          >         > >> to<br>
          >         > >>>> help<br>
          >         > >>>>>> you grok what the
          fuck.<br>
          >         > >>>><br>
          >         > >>>> I continue to believe you
          would benefit from seeking<br>
          >         professional<br>
          >         > >> help<br>
          >         > >>>> on this matter.<br>
          >         > >>>><br>
          >         > >>>>> strong community. My
          view is that people have run<br>
          >         > >>>>> to the community
          prematurely, to their own detriment.<br>
          >         > >>>><br>
          >         > >>>> Have you thought to try,
          instead of defending your<br>
          >         opinions, to<br>
          >         > >> query<br>
          >         > >>>> & seek to understand
          why people have felt that it is<br>
          >         best to act<br>
          >         > >> this<br>
          >         > >>>> way?<br>
          >         > >>>><br>
          >         > >>>>>><br>
          >         > >>>>>> I came to
          Noisebridge and found a huge community of<br>
          >         > >> technically<br>
          >         > >>>>>> engaged wonderful
          hacker friends who bent over<br>
          >         backwards to<br>
          >         > >> teach<br>
          >         > >>>> me<br>
          >         > >>>>>> how to work in
          hardware, with zero social<br>
          >         expectations or<br>
          >         > >>>> assholery.<br>
          >         > >>>>> JS: me, too.<br>
          >         > >>>>><br>
          >         > >>>>>> That place is gone.<br>
          >         > >>>>> JS: I'm not sure, there
          are lots of very fine<br>
          >         > >>>>> people still at
          noisebridge.<br>
          >         > >>>>><br>
          >         > >>>><br>
          >         > >>>> I AM quite sure,
          thankyouverymuch, because the<br>
          >         experiences I have<br>
          >         > >> had<br>
          >         > >>>> at Noisebridge over the
          last 2 years are so wildly<br>
          >         different than<br>
          >         > >> the<br>
          >         > >>>> previous two. Perhaps if
          instead of dismissing this<br>
          >         point of view<br>
          >         > >> you<br>
          >         > >>>> were to examine it and seek
          to understand why someone<br>
          >         might hold<br>
          >         > >> it,<br>
          >         > >>>> you would be able to become
          less confused about why<br>
          >         people are<br>
          >         > >>>> FREAKING THE FUCK OUT about
          things like BEING GRABBED<br>
          >         OR<br>
          >         > >> ASSAULTED.<br>
          >         > >>>><br>
          >         > >>>>>> Perhaps 2169 will
          continue but a community where the<br>
          >         old hands<br>
          >         > >>>> present<br>
          >         > >>>>>> think assault
          should be dealt with in isolation,<br>
          >         > >>>>> JS: assault should not
          be dealt with in isolation.<br>
          >         > >>>>><br>
          >         > >>>>>> and the old hands
          absent feel entitled to weigh in<br>
          >         against<br>
          >         > >> reform<br>
          >         > >>>>>> measures aimed at
          REDUCING INCIDENCES OF ASSAULT<br>
          >         without<br>
          >         > >>>> constructive<br>
          >         > >>>>>> input, is no place
          I want to support.<br>
          >         > >>>>> JS: I'm against
          formality in general; I'm for<br>
          >         > >>>>> collaboration,
          affection, acceptance, mutual<br>
          >         > >>>>> support; I think having
          policies is a dangerous<br>
          >         > >>>>> practice, partly
          because the fact of the policy<br>
          >         > >>>>> substitutes for
          understanding and action<br>
          >         > >>>>> appropriate to
          situations, partly because the<br>
          >         > >>>>> policy may,
          unfortunately, be seen as a<br>
          >         > >>>>> substitute for one's
          own action and one's own<br>
          >         > >>>>> sense of self-worth.<br>
          >         > >>>><br>
          >         > >>>> Instead of undermining the
          efforts of people seeking to<br>
          >         SECURE<br>
          >         > >> THEIR<br>
          >         > >>>> PERSONAL SAFETY you could
          try to work towards building<br>
          >         the kind of<br>
          >         > >>>> understanding you say
          should be used instead of<br>
          >         policies... then<br>
          >         > >>>> perhaps there wouldn't be
          so many people seeking to<br>
          >         establish<br>
          >         > >>>> policies.<br>
          >         > >>>><br>
          >         > >>>> R.<br>
          >         > >>>><br>
          >         > >>>>><br>
          >         > >>>>>> R.<br>
          >         > >>>>>><br>
          >         > >>>>>> On Nov 15, 2013
          2:29 PM, "Snail"<br>
          >         <<a moz-do-not-send="true"
            href="mailto:snailtsunami@gmail.com">snailtsunami@gmail.com</a>><br>
          >         > >> wrote:<br>
          >         > >>>>>>          On Fri,
          Nov 15, 2013 at 11:13 AM, jim<br>
          >         > >>>> <<a
            moz-do-not-send="true" href="mailto:jim@systemateka.com">jim@systemateka.com</a>><br>
          >         > >>>>>>          wrote:<br>
          >         > >>>>>>                    
           As to females being harassed,<br>
          >         for cases of<br>
          >         > >>>>>>                
           crude coppings of feels, I dislike<br>
          >         taht female<br>
          >         > >>>>>>                
           turning to the community for<br>
          >         support; I would<br>
          >         > >>>>>>                
           eagerly defend any female who hauled<br>
          >         off and<br>
          >         > >>>>>>                
           slugged whoever copped a feel or to<br>
          >         go get<br>
          >         > >> some<br>
          >         > >>>>>>                
           friends and return to verbally<br>
          >         educate the<br>
          >         > >>>>>>                
           offender: it's dis-empowering to<br>
          >         perceive<br>
          >         > >> one's<br>
          >         > >>>>>>                
           self as a victim and turn to a<br>
          >         community for<br>
          >         > >>>>>>                
           support for what is an individual<br>
          >         incident.<br>
          >         > >>>>>><br>
          >         > >>>>>>          Whoa -
          whoa whoa whoa - whoaaaaa...<br>
          >         > >>>>>><br>
          >         > >>>>>>          Time out -
          did you really just say that<br>
          >         women who get<br>
          >         > >>>> groped<br>
          >         > >>>>>>          ("cases of
          crude coppings of feels") should<br>
          >         not ask<br>
          >         > >> the<br>
          >         > >>>>>>          community
          to help them out? And you believe<br>
          >         that it's<br>
          >         > >>>>>>        
           disempowering somehow??<br>
          >         > >>>>>><br>
          >         > >>>>>><br>
          >         > >>>>>>          And that
          people should just punch people or<br>
          >         deal with<br>
          >         > >> it<br>
          >         > >>>> on<br>
          >         > >>>>>>          their own?
          Is this really what you're<br>
          >         suggesting?<br>
          >         > >>>>>><br>
          >         > >>>>>><br>
          >         > >>>>>><br>
          >         > >>>>>>                    
           There will be no way fully to<br>
          >         suppress<br>
          >         > >> such<br>
          >         > >>>>>>                
           actions taken by horney and<br>
          >         inconsiderate<br>
          >         > >>>>>>                
           personages, policies and rules and<br>
          >         committee<br>
          >         > >>>>>>                
           resolutions aside (far, far aside, I<br>
          >         hope).<br>
          >         > >>>>>><br>
          >         > >>>>>><br>
          >         > >>>>>><br>
          >         > >>>>>>          I can't
          even. Here's a good way to suppress<br>
          >         the<br>
          >         > >> actions of<br>
          >         > >>>>>>          "horney"
          or inconsiderate people: never let<br>
          >         them back<br>
          >         > >> in<br>
          >         > >>>>>>        
           Noisebridge because that's a terrible excuse<br>
          >         for their<br>
          >         > >>>>>>          actions!<br>
          >         > >>>>>><br>
          >         > >>>>>><br>
          >         > >>>>>><br>
          >         > >>>>>>                    
           Please ask yourself if you are<br>
          >         prone to<br>
          >         > >>>>>>                
           express yourself when you believe<br>
          >         you have the<br>
          >         > >>>>>>                
           "high ground" and can properly scold<br>
          >         others.<br>
          >         > >> I.e.,<br>
          >         > >>>>>>                
           are you living too much with anger?<br>
          >         > >>>>>><br>
          >         > >>>>>><br>
          >         > >>>>>>          With the
          rage of a thousand burning stars.<br>
          >         > >>>>>><br>
          >         > >>>>>><br>
          >         > >>>>>>          TO
          EVERYONE ELSE READING THIS - There are<br>
          >         lots of<br>
          >         > >> people<br>
          >         > >>>> in<br>
          >         > >>>>>>          the
          community at large who will help you out<br>
          >         if<br>
          >         > >> someone is<br>
          >         > >>>>>>          creeping
          on you or worse, whether you are<br>
          >         "taht<br>
          >         > >> females"<br>
          >         > >>>> or<br>
          >         > >>>>>>          just a
          plain ol' human being! Don't let what<br>
          >         Jim says<br>
          >         > >>>> dissuade<br>
          >         > >>>>>>          you from
          reporting harassment or assault or<br>
          >         pointing<br>
          >         > >> out<br>
          >         > >>>>>>          creepers!
          This is not an opinion everyone<br>
          >         here<br>
          >         > >> carries.<br>
          >         > >>>> Please<br>
          >         > >>>>>>          don't ever
          feel like it's your fault or that<br>
          >         you're<br>
          >         > >>>> required<br>
          >         > >>>>>>          to punch
          people - it's a valid and rational<br>
          >         response<br>
          >         > >> to<br>
          >         > >>>> remove<br>
          >         > >>>>>>          yourself
          from a dangerous situation and try<br>
          >         to sort<br>
          >         > >> things<br>
          >         > >>>> out<br>
          >         > >>>>>>          later from
          a safe place rather than confront<br>
          >         your<br>
          >         > >>>>>>        
           harasser/assaulter. If someone is creeping<br>
          >         on you,<br>
          >         > >> they<br>
          >         > >>>> are<br>
          >         > >>>>>>          pretty
          much always creeping on OTHERS, too,<br>
          >         so you are<br>
          >         > >> not<br>
          >         > >>>>>>          alone or
          stuck in some isolated personal<br>
          >         incident! And<br>
          >         > >> as<br>
          >         > >>>> a<br>
          >         > >>>>>>          community
          we can try to make Noisebridge a<br>
          >         safer place<br>
          >         > >> for<br>
          >         > >>>>>>          everyone.<br>
          >         > >>>>>><br>
          >         > >>>>>><br>
          >         > >>>>>>          Also,
          women really appreciate being called<br>
          >         women and<br>
          >         > >> not<br>
          >         > >>>>>>          "females".
          Do you go around saying "the<br>
          >         males" when<br>
          >         > >>>> referring<br>
          >         > >>>>>>          to men?
          Probably not.<br>
          >         > >>>>>><br>
          >         > >>>>>><br>
          >         > >>>>>>          Angry
          forever,<br>
          >         > >>>>>>          Snail<br>
          >         > >>>>>><br>
          >         > >>>>>><br>
          >         > >>>>>>          --<br>
          >         > >>>>>>        
           -Snailssnailssnailssnailssnailssnailssnails<br>
          >         > >>>>>>        
           ............. _@y<br>
          >         > >>>>>>          <a
            moz-do-not-send="true"
            href="http://obamaischeckingyouremail.tumblr.com/"
            target="_blank">http://obamaischeckingyouremail.tumblr.com/</a><br>
          >         > >>>>>><br>
          >         > >>>>>><br>
          >         > >>>>>><br>
          >          _______________________________________________<br>
          >         > >>>>>>        
           Noisebridge-discuss mailing list<br>
          >         > >>>>>>          <a
            moz-do-not-send="true"
            href="mailto:Noisebridge-discuss@lists.noisebridge.net">Noisebridge-discuss@lists.noisebridge.net</a><br>
          >         > >>>>>><br>
          >         > >>>><br>
          >         <a moz-do-not-send="true"
            href="https://www.noisebridge.net/mailman/listinfo/noisebridge-discuss"
            target="_blank">https://www.noisebridge.net/mailman/listinfo/noisebridge-discuss</a><br>
          >         > >>>>>><br>
          >         > >>>>><br>
          >         > >>>>><br>
          >         > >>>><br>
          >         > >>><br>
          >         > >>><br>
          >         > >><br>
          >         > >><br>
          >         > >>
          _______________________________________________<br>
          >         > >> Noisebridge-discuss mailing list<br>
          >         > >> <a moz-do-not-send="true"
            href="mailto:Noisebridge-discuss@lists.noisebridge.net">Noisebridge-discuss@lists.noisebridge.net</a><br>
          >         > >><br>
          >         <a moz-do-not-send="true"
            href="https://www.noisebridge.net/mailman/listinfo/noisebridge-discuss"
            target="_blank">https://www.noisebridge.net/mailman/listinfo/noisebridge-discuss</a><br>
          >         > ><br>
          >         > ><br>
          >         > >
          _______________________________________________<br>
          >         > > Noisebridge-discuss mailing list<br>
          >         > > <a moz-do-not-send="true"
            href="mailto:Noisebridge-discuss@lists.noisebridge.net">Noisebridge-discuss@lists.noisebridge.net</a><br>
          >         > ><br>
          >         <a moz-do-not-send="true"
            href="https://www.noisebridge.net/mailman/listinfo/noisebridge-discuss"
            target="_blank">https://www.noisebridge.net/mailman/listinfo/noisebridge-discuss</a><br>
          >         > ><br>
          >         >
          _______________________________________________<br>
          >         > Noisebridge-discuss mailing list<br>
          >         > <a moz-do-not-send="true"
            href="mailto:Noisebridge-discuss@lists.noisebridge.net">Noisebridge-discuss@lists.noisebridge.net</a><br>
          >         ><br>
          >         <a moz-do-not-send="true"
            href="https://www.noisebridge.net/mailman/listinfo/noisebridge-discuss"
            target="_blank">https://www.noisebridge.net/mailman/listinfo/noisebridge-discuss</a><br>
          ><br>
          ><br>
          >         _______________________________________________<br>
          >         Noisebridge-discuss mailing list<br>
          >         <a moz-do-not-send="true"
            href="mailto:Noisebridge-discuss@lists.noisebridge.net">Noisebridge-discuss@lists.noisebridge.net</a><br>
          >         <a moz-do-not-send="true"
            href="https://www.noisebridge.net/mailman/listinfo/noisebridge-discuss"
            target="_blank">https://www.noisebridge.net/mailman/listinfo/noisebridge-discuss</a><br>
          <br>
          <br>
        </blockquote>
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      <pre wrap="">_______________________________________________
Noisebridge-discuss mailing list
<a class="moz-txt-link-abbreviated" href="mailto:Noisebridge-discuss@lists.noisebridge.net">Noisebridge-discuss@lists.noisebridge.net</a>
<a class="moz-txt-link-freetext" href="https://www.noisebridge.net/mailman/listinfo/noisebridge-discuss">https://www.noisebridge.net/mailman/listinfo/noisebridge-discuss</a>
</pre>
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