[Noisebridge-discuss] Sex Unconference

[maymay]

> Jason Damisch wrote:
>> Calling me a motherfucker does not make me feel any less uneasy
>> about kink.  It does nothing to ease my concerns that this
>> civilization is aggressive, and that aggressiveness is reflected
>> in everything which it touches, including sexuality.

That sounds like a fascinating and excellent topic for a KinkForAll  
presentation, actually. I'd love to hear your thoughts about this if  
you'd like to do a presentation at the event, wherever it ends up  
happening.

On Oct 25, 2009, at 10:24 PM, Meredith L. Patterson wrote:

> Is your unease rooted in your perception of kink as aggressive?
> […]
> Maymay has mentioned that KinkForAll is a discussion and learning  
> event,
> not a play event/sex party/&c.

It should perhaps also be stressed (again) that KinkForAll is not an  
event that focuses on any specific sex acts, such as those predicated  
on a consensual imbalance of power between partners (i.e., BDSM),  
although such topics are certainly also welcome. Meredith highlighted  
this perfectly when they said:

> kink go[es] far
> beyond the typical perception of physical violence and
> dominance/submission play. Sensation play, food play, teledildonics,
> role-playing, and pretty much any kind of object fetishism are just  
> the
> first few things that come to mind when I think of practices usually
> described as kinky which often don't involve any behaviour which could
> be characterised as aggressive.


Moreover, again, KinkForAll tries to promote discussion and education  
about *all* aspects of sexuality, not just the activities involved in  
having a sexualized encounter with someone (or thing) else. Its  
tagline is "A serendipitous, ad-hoc unconference about the  
intersection of sexuality with the rest of life." I'd love to hear  
from lawyers willing and able to talk about things like obscenity law,  
or painters talk about artists' intent versus a sexual gaze,[2] or any  
number of other topics that relate in some way to sexuality but are  
not sex-act-driven. (Personally, I'd likely skip the sex-act-driven  
sessions, if there are any.)

In that sense, KinkForAll uses the word "kink" to connote only and  
exactly its dictionary definition, "unconventional sexual taste or  
behavior." Try your hand at a google search of "defining kink"[0] for  
some great resources to learn about the distinctions between (for  
instance) common misconceptions about the word "kink" and its unbiased  
meaning.[1]

> In that light, I suggest that you might
> find it usefully educational to meet and talk with kinky people in a
> non-sexually-charged setting and learn more about what motivates  
> them. I
> think you will find that inherently aggressive natures aren't it.
>
> Cheers,
> --mlp


A growing number of participants at previous KinkForAll unconferences  
have been people who would not identify themselves as "kinky." I think  
this is wonderful because it increases learning opportunities for  
everyone there. If I understand correctly, this is precisely the sort  
of diversity of participants that Noisebridge seeks to attract.

Cheers,
-maymay
Blog: http://maybemaimed.com
Talk show: http://KinkOnTap.com
Community: http://KinkForAll.org
Volunteering: http://ConversioVirium.org/author/maymay

EXTERNAL REFERENCES:

[0] http://google.com/search?q=defining+kink
[1] http://followsthesun.com/?p=359