[Noisebridge-discuss] Wanna be a roomie in a maker house?

Taylor Alexander tlalexander at gmail.com
Thu Sep 15 21:16:58 UTC 2011


Also jumping into this mess.

I have an extremely crude sense of humor and will generally defend any kind
of sexism or racism etc if its in the name of comedy of any kind - even
incidental like in hosing postings, so I'm certainly not "uptight" about
this stuff.

I just wanted to note why preferring women can be deemed as creepy, since
that seemed to be unclear. Its not about if it seems creepy by itself - its
more about how many creepers there are out there who *do* have creepy
reasons for preferring women. So if you *don't* have a creepy reason for
preferring women, you really want to make that clear in the same breath as
mentioning your preference. A simple "our house already has 3 men and one
woman, and she said she'd prefer one more woman to balance it out" would
have been a waaaaaay more effective way of mentioning it. Its not so much
about the woman being too "uptight", its that a woman moving into a new
place doesn't want to get put into a dangerous situation, so for all they
know you're a weirdo who expects something *extra* out of this situation
(I've heard this is sadly pretty common on craigslist). And lets not touch
on why it matters more for women, peeps.

I also understand being politically incorrect on purpose to weed out the
uptight people. That's pretty much my M.O. I'll often end up making rape
jokes within a few minutes of meeting new people. The ones that laugh are my
type.

Unfortunately, that can push away a lot of people who might *otherwise*
appreciate the jokes if they knew you better, so its not the best tactic,
I'll admit. So I use some caution still and don't do it all the time. One
place I would really avoid being my normal asshole-self is in a housing
posting. I'd mention something like "we appreciate dark humor and may not be
best for those who are easily offended". I have a feeling that would be
enough to weed out the uptight people without looking like too much of an
asshole.

Trust me, I spend a lot of time evaluating on how much of an asshole I
should be to new people. I'm working on getting this shit down to a science.
As much as I hate to admit it, *some* reservation is important, at times.
Housing postings are one of those. You can *state* you're an asshole without
actually showing it. Good tactic.

And you won't be offended by my use of asshole since you know what I mean,
and I'm calling myself an asshole too.

Oh, and saying preference of men or women is like bacon versus chicken....
yeah, you're not going to make any friends with that comparison. Unlike
female roommates, the chicken doesn't care if you're planning on fucking it
later.

Also, to others, lets not attack me for my use of "uptight". I'm just trying
to keep it simple.

Hope this all was useful input to those involved.

Also, sounds like a kick ass house. I don't have a vagina but can't really
move up to the city anyway so it doesn't matter. Otherwise though, I'd
totally be down.

-Taylor


On Thu, Sep 15, 2011 at 1:47 PM, Sean Cusack <sean.p.cusack at gmail.com>wrote:

> That's fine - if you're uncomfortable, don't apply. Ta da!
>
> Also, just to re-re-clarify. There is 0 discrimination occurring here. The
> first word on my post was "prefer". Duncan thought it would be cool to throw
> the discrimination card into the mix to see how people on the list would
> blow up. Well done...it's working.  People know me at noisebridge - ask
> around before assuming I'm a bigoted lech.
>
> If anyone else actually wants to apply, its a rad house. We build big big
> metal stuff a lot. There will be monkey bars everywhere and I'm making a
> loft out of old military bed frames and (maybe) a big ferry boat prop...if I
> can get it for cheap, and if I can figure out a way to move it into my
> bedroom without using a crane. There is a subsection of noisebridge that
> loves making crazy things, and we'd love to have one of those peeps live
> with us. If you're going to twist a simple e-mail into something that you
> know its not in an effort to generate a response, frankly, we don't want you
> in the house.
>
> Sean
>
> On Thu, Sep 15, 2011 at 1:37 PM, hk_ <dis at gruntle.org> wrote:
>
>> fyi bro, a way to make females interested and not uncomfortable replying
>> to your ad is to not mention their vaginas right off the bat. you may think
>> you are being witty and hilarious, but in fact you are being a weird douche
>> of the highest order. if you absolutely must mention their vaginas in the
>> ad, then try having the female in the house send the email.
>>
>> think about it like this, if someone were inviting your mom to move in
>> with them, do you really think she would be super awesome comfy if their
>> first exchange was regarding her vagina?
>>
>> -hep
>>
>>
>> On Thu, Sep 15, 2011 at 1:32 PM, Sean Cusack <sean.p.cusack at gmail.com>wrote:
>>
>>> There are 3 guys, 1 girl in the house. Adding another guy to the mix
>>> would make the girl really uncomfortable. My original post for this on
>>> craiglist did *not* include the bolded, italicized font, and about 70% of
>>> the responses I received were from self proclaimed gay, bi, or effeminate
>>> men which they thought entitled them to being "just as good as a girl"
>>> (yes...a direct quote). The below is included to save me and potential
>>> applicants a bunch of time from sifting through people that we aren't really
>>> looking for. We needz some (naturally produced and recurring) estrogen.
>>>
>>> Looking for a female roomie is creepy?? Really? That's like saying having
>>> a preference for chicken over bacon is also creepy. (Actually, that *is*
>>> creepy...bacon rulez). Maybe you should be asking yourself some questions as
>>> to why living with a female room mate equates to "this guy wants a hot
>>> personal home maker + stripper sex slave". (I want one of those too...not as
>>> a roomie...I'll send a follow-on post in the future).
>>>
>>> Lastly, if your suggestion was supposed to be friendly and non-drama
>>> generating, maybe you would have dropped the hyperbole and BS legal stuff,
>>> and just asked why the room mate needed to be female? You know...like people
>>> who want to offer helpful advice typically do. As you pointed out - this
>>> *is* Noisebridge - not the love-puddle-politically-correct club. Stop making
>>> up ways to stir the pot.
>>>
>>> Sean
>>>
>>> On Thu, Sep 15, 2011 at 12:50 PM, Just Duncan <justduncan at gmail.com>wrote:
>>>
>>>> *-Prefer someone female. From some of the craiglist responses I've
>>>> received, there seems to be some confusion here...that does *not* mean
>>>> gay, or effeminate male, it means you have a vagina. Look down...you'll
>>>> figure it out.*
>>>>
>>>> I'm going to give the benefit of a doubt here of an impulsive, un-fully
>>>> thought-through posting.  No biggie, no desire for drama, nothing
>>>> personal... we all have had misunderstood communications.  That said, I
>>>> gently suggest that this posting would be most excellent re-posted *
>>>> without* the bolded words in the italicized excerpt above.  As it is
>>>> now, this offering of an opportunity for housing suggests homophobic
>>>> discrimination, which is illegal, with significant fines and puts your
>>>> master lease at risk.  More importantly, reading this on the discussion list
>>>> of Noisebridge-- which values, promotes, and protects diversity -- is
>>>> inappropriate, offensive, and, well, just not excellent. when .
>>>>
>>>> The fact that you and specifically looking for a housemate with a vagina
>>>> is, well, kinda creepy.  Are there any household services that this
>>>> housemate will be expected to provide?  Must it be a reproductively
>>>> functioning vagina or is post-menopausal cool?  Are post-op transgendered
>>>> folks acceptable?  I would expect this ad in Gaffney, SC, but this is San
>>>> Francisco.  This is Noisebridge.
>>>>
>>>> I realize that this may not be the best move for me to win friends and
>>>> influence people, but sincerely hope my suggestion will be viewed and taken
>>>> in the friendly, helpful spirit that I am intending it.  Peace-- Duncan
>>>>
>>>>
>>>>
>>>> On Thu, Sep 15, 2011 at 10:57 AM, Sean Cusack <sean.p.cusack at gmail.com>wrote:
>>>>
>>>>> Hey kiddos -
>>>>>
>>>>> I'm the master tenant in a house full of makers...yay! One dude just
>>>>> flaked on us prior to move in...boo :(. That means, there could be a spot
>>>>> for you to live with us if you are interested...yay!
>>>>>
>>>>> The deets:
>>>>> -5 person house in total @ 24th and Bartlett (half block between
>>>>> Mission and Valencia)
>>>>> -We're all big metal structure people - 1 guy works full time for
>>>>> burning man DPW, 2 are techshop employees, 1 is a crazy chemist who has a
>>>>> thing for fire and giant art (me)
>>>>> -We're looking for a maker to move in by Oct 1
>>>>> -The room is giant, and you get a giant closet all to yourself
>>>>> -Looking for $1050/mo for rent
>>>>> -Prefer someone female. From some of the craiglist responses I've
>>>>> received, there seems to be some confusion here...that does *not* mean gay,
>>>>> or effeminate male, it means you have a vagina. Look down...you'll figure it
>>>>> out.
>>>>>
>>>>> If anyone is interested in checking the place out, lemme know!!
>>>>>
>>>>> Sean
>>>>>
>>>>>
>>>>>
>>>>> _______________________________________________
>>>>> Noisebridge-discuss mailing list
>>>>> Noisebridge-discuss at lists.noisebridge.net
>>>>> https://www.noisebridge.net/mailman/listinfo/noisebridge-discuss
>>>>>
>>>>>
>>>>
>>>
>>> _______________________________________________
>>> Noisebridge-discuss mailing list
>>> Noisebridge-discuss at lists.noisebridge.net
>>> https://www.noisebridge.net/mailman/listinfo/noisebridge-discuss
>>>
>>>
>>
>>
>> --
>> --
>> hep
>> dis at gruntle.org || 415 867 9472
>>
>>
>
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>
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