[Noisebridge-discuss] Hacker Headlines: 2011 Retrospective

Elijah Post elijahpost at gmail.com
Sun Jan 8 22:06:57 UTC 2012


This made my day.

On Sun, Jan 8, 2012 at 2:00 PM, Tony Longshanks LeTigre <
anthonyletigre at gmail.com> wrote:

> Hey Muppets, Wizards & assorted autonomous Mutants
>
> As a special treat, I give you an advance from ZiP<http://www.noisebridge.net/wiki/Zine>Issue One (release date Jan. 19!) that I hope will illustrate the healing
> and transformative power of humor, without stepping on anyone's toes
>
> You guys have no idea how much fun I have with this stuff. If I could
> actually make a *living* doing this? omg
>
> Bcc'ing to a few others I haven't talked to in a while, though you may not
> get all the Noisebridge in-jokes
>
> *
> HACKER HEADLINES
>
> *A Fond Look Back at 2011 (Plus a Few That Are Current)
>
>
>
>
> *Red Hackerphone Possessed by Irritating Pixie
>
> Hippopotamaphile Editor Decries “Odd-Toed Ungulate” Software Nomenclature
>
> Study Finds History Repeating Itself More Often, Alzheimer's Feared
>
> Assault Alleged at Noisebridge, Email Storm Expected
>
> Member Accused of Assault Storms Out of Space Vowing Never to Return
>
> Member Accused of Assault Returns After Two-Day Hiatus, Seizes Control of
> Kitchen
>
> Katherine Plans Chinese Dinner for Christmas, States She is Not Jewish
>
> Soup-Making Endeavor Results in Messy Blender Blunder
>
> Cockroaches Believed to be Coordinating Raids with Mice
>
> Drywall Sanding Coats Hackerspace with Fine White Powder, DEA Investigates
>
> Noisebridge Assault Victim Expected to Make Full Recovery
>
> Occupy Wall Street Camp Evicted, Moves to Noisebridge Sofas
>
> RAYCE Receives Harsh Smackdown at Member Meeting
>
> Coffee Grounds Prove Excellent Substrate for Shiitake Spores
>
> Noisebridge Code Writer Delights with Don LaFontaine Impression
>
> ZiP Editor Sleeps Through Class Again, Won't Ever Learn at This Rate
>
> Hackers Rendered Irrelevant as New Program Allows Computers to Hack
> Themselves
>
> Flesh Eating Computer Virus Unaffected by e-PARASITE Bill
>
> Pirates Fight for Right to Party, Accuse SOPA of Hate Speech
>
> Thanksgiving Feast Results in Gluttony, Excessive Eggnog Consumption
>
> Money Believed Stolen From Unsecured Receptacle in Middle of Busy Open
> Space
>
> Large Sofa Disappears from Library, Foul Play Not Ruled Out
>
> Missing Sofa Now Homeless, Spotted in Various Places
>
> Board of Directors Overheard Mocking Their Own Authority
>
> Food Items Marked NO SHARE on Only 4 out of 6 Sides Assumed Up for Grabs
>
> New Bill Would Restrict Fire Escape Use to Escaping From Fires Only,
> Smokers Choke with Indignation
>
> Dearth of Disabled Hackers Blamed for Recreational Use of Wheelchair
>
> Cripples, Queers and Fatsos Accuse Headline Writer of Insensitive and
> Hateful Language
>
> Noisebot Programmed to Single Out and Disparage White Male Oppressors in
> New Inclusiveness Initiative
>
> Humor Attempted to Defuse Touchy Subject Flies Over Heads, Lands on
> Forbidden Fire Escape
>
> Leftover Christmas Food Attracts Rats, Does Little to Improve Air Quality
>
> Clever Hacker Asks What Would Happen if Corporate Machine were Simply
> Unplugged
>
> Ribald Stand-up Comedian Trapped in Elevator with Anti-Oppression Activists
>
> Military-Industrial Complex Issued Foreclosure Notice by Group of
> Anarchist Pranksters
>
> Bioluminescent Mushrooms Considered Very Cool Despite Lack of Psilocybin
>
> Neglected Crisper in Fridge Believed to be Source of Unpleasant Smell
>
> One Percent Sympathizer Feels Almost Everyone is Against Him
>
> ZiP Editor with Virtually No Programming Knowledge Makes it Up as He Goes
> Along, Apparently Convinces
>
> Activist Code Writer Claims Binary System is Broken, Proposes Adding
> Number 2
>
> Cursory Observations Reveal Wide Range of Emotional Maturity Levels Among
> Noisebridge Users
>
> Joergen Stays Late Christmas Night, Rocks Out on Guitar Again
>
> Noisebridge Member Wishes to Remain in Background, Would Hate This Headline
>
> New Study Finds Unemployed Slackers Have More Free Time, Get Less Done
>
> ZiP Editor Wishes to Write for Onion One Day*
>
> _______________________________________________
> Noisebridge-discuss mailing list
> Noisebridge-discuss at lists.noisebridge.net
> https://www.noisebridge.net/mailman/listinfo/noisebridge-discuss
>
>


-- 
*Elijah Louis Spenser Post
Mechanic (San Francisco Bike Kitchen)*
*Participant (NoiseRep at Noisebridge)*
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