[Noisebridge-discuss] Feminist Book Club For Men: tomorrow 7pm was: The Nuclear Option

Thu Jan 16 02:38:20 UTC 2014

Lee,
No one is obliged to interact with you.  You misbehaved on the wiki, and
lost privileges.  You then engaged in a campaign of harassment against Tom
that was vastly out of proportion with the issue at hand, in which you
continuously sent him passive-aggressive emails, looked up his number
online so you could call him on his personal phone without invitation, and
dragged unrelated targets into your obsession with him.  Danny already gave
you your wiki privileges back, so at this point you are just trying to
demand the attention of someone who has made it perfectly clear that they
do not want to engage with you.

I'd like to remind you of some of the information in our anti-harassment
policy: "Harassment includes offensive verbal comments related to gender,
gender identity and expression, sexual orientation, disability, physical
appearance, body size, race, religion, sexual images in public spaces,
*deliberate
intimidation, stalking, following*, harassing photography or recording,
sustained disruption of talks or other events, inappropriate physical
contact, and unwelcome sexual attention...*People asked to stop any
harassing behavior are expected to comply immediately*."

This is me telling you that what you're doing is harassment, and asking you
to stop.  Do not contact him again.

Hannah

On Tue, Jan 14, 2014 at 11:56 PM, Snail <snailtsunami at gmail.com> wrote:

> So, you think he's doing a poor job of it and want to volunteer to run the
> book club discussion yourself? Or do you have another nominee in mind?
>
>
> On Tue, Jan 14, 2014 at 10:57 PM, Lee Sonko <lee at lee.org> wrote:
>
>> Hannah writes:
>> -------- Original Message -------------
>>  I think you need to back off here.  Replying to a thread about something
>> awesome and very much needed at Noisebridge to dredge up a personal
>> grievance you have with an individual is an obvious and deliberate attempt
>> to stir up drama and to drag the feminist book club down with it.  That is
>> not cool.  The way you describe your interactions with Tom (calling &
>> emailing him repeatedly, despite him making it clear that he doesn't want
>> to speak with you) is a set of behavior that frankly would incredibly freak
>> me out if you were doing it to me.  If feminism is "the belief that men and
>> women should have equal rights and opportunities" then I hope you don't do
>> this to ladies because I'd be seriously threatened by this kind of behavior.
>> -------- End of Original Message ------
>>
>> Tom changed my rights on the wiki and then refused to discuss the matter,
>> or any matter, repeatedly. That was my first and only interaction with him
>> despite me trying nicely to resolve the situation. I am receiving a clear
>> signal that he is not a good communicator.  That directly relates to him
>> organizing a feminist book club; I suppose it actually only relates to him
>> facilitating a discussion, not organizing, but the two tasks often go
>> hand-in-hand. If he is petty and non-communicative with me, a virtual
>> stranger, I don't believe he would make a good leader for a book club
>> founded on discussing the sometimes strained communication between people
>> of different genders. Hence my comments.
>>
>> >calling & emailing him repeatedly, despite him making it clear that he
>> doesn't want to speak with you)  is a set of behavior that frankly
>> >would incredibly freak me out if you were doing it to me
>>
>> Please reread my original email, that is not what I wrote, nor is that
>> what happened. He used his powerful rights on the wiki against my account
>> and then (as now) refuses to communicate about the exercise of those
>> rights. The issue has, sadly, never been resolved because Tom continues
>> to not communicate with me. He told me to stop calling on the phone so I
>> stopped. He hasn't responded to any of my emails except those I've CCed to
>> the list. So that's how I communicate with him. I'm playing a game of his
>> making. I remain open to discussion and resolution. Tom seems to remain
>> closed. That seems like a poor choice for an organizer and perhaps
>> facilitator of a feminist book club for men.
>>
>> I hope that the feminist book club for men meeting went well. Did it?
>>
>>
>> Lee
>>
>>
>> On Wed, Jan 8, 2014 at 6:32 PM, Hannah Grimm <dharlette at gmail.com> wrote:
>>
>>> Hey Lee,
>>> I think you need to back off here.  Replying to a thread about something
>>> awesome and very much needed at Noisebridge to dredge up a personal
>>> grievance you have with an individual is an obvious and deliberate attempt
>>> to stir up drama and to drag the feminist book club down with it.  That is
>>> not cool.  The way you describe your interactions with Tom (calling &
>>> emailing him repeatedly, despite him making it clear that he doesn't want
>>> to speak with you) is a set of behavior that frankly would incredibly freak
>>> me out if you were doing it to me.  If feminism is "the belief that men
>>> and women should have equal rights and opportunities" then I hope you don't
>>> do this to ladies because I'd be seriously threatened by this kind of
>>> behavior.
>>>
>>> Hannah
>>>
>>>
>>>  On Wed, Jan 8, 2014 at 9:23 AM, jarrod hicks <hicksu at gmail.com> wrote:
>>>
>>>>  Organizing an event at Noisebridge does not require that the organizer
>>>> be the best person for the job (far from it), only that the person be
>>>> willing to do the work necessary to make the event/class/meeting
>>>> happen; 'and proud we are of all of them'. Even if in this case by
>>>> "not the best" you may actually mean "I think you are possibly the
>>>> worst", events/classes/meetings are educational for their facilitator
>>>> as well and so not being good at something is still a great
>>>> prerequisite for organizing getting together with others to learn.
>>>> _______________________________________________
>>>> Noisebridge-discuss mailing list
>>>> Noisebridge-discuss at lists.noisebridge.net
>>>> https://www.noisebridge.net/mailman/listinfo/noisebridge-discuss
>>>>
>>>
>>>
>>
>> _______________________________________________
>> Noisebridge-discuss mailing list
>> Noisebridge-discuss at lists.noisebridge.net
>> https://www.noisebridge.net/mailman/listinfo/noisebridge-discuss
>>
>>
>
>
> --
> -Snailssnailssnailssnailssnailssnailssnails
> ............. _ at y
> http://obamaischeckingyouremail.tumblr.com/
>
> _______________________________________________
> Noisebridge-discuss mailing list
> Noisebridge-discuss at lists.noisebridge.net
> https://www.noisebridge.net/mailman/listinfo/noisebridge-discuss
>
>
-------------- next part --------------
An HTML attachment was scrubbed...
URL: <http://www.noisebridge.net/pipermail/noisebridge-discuss/attachments/20140115/4d5536a3/attachment.html>